Confused Indifference

What is it that we're all looking for? And when we find it, how is it that, we end up still looking for something else? When is it ever enough? I've asked this question over and over again. Would we even be able to figure out what 'enough' is or was??

I always played the numbers game with my mental breakdowns or lack thereof. Time just makes me so complacent, no matter where I am. Ha. No matter where I am, I always feel like I should be somewhere else. Whaddaya call that?!

I'm not sure I ever really knew where my place in the world was supposed to be. It's not as if I feel like I belong anywhere. Like I belong nowhere and everywhere all at once. Leading this hurricane of emotion and curiosity towards the brink of my demise. And I know it seems slightly off, but I've been a lot more morbid than usual. Mainly at night. I've been often wondering if I'll open my eyes the next day. And I'm not too upset about it, it almost feels as if it's supposed to happen that way.
But being the curious person that I am, it does make me sad because I AM unaware of what's to come. What follows death?  They never come back to tell us, do they? Like it's one big surprise that everyone has to discover on their own.

Maybe it's like everyone on Earth is collecting pieces of their own puzzle. Putting them together to get the big picture. Some people complete their puzzle, some people never find the missing pieces, and some people's ending image isn't what they thought they were putting together.

I'm as rambly as a drunken sailor. Just feelin' a little under the weather emotionally, is all...