Tuesday, January 17, 2012

Nostalgia With Friends

A lot can happen as we grow older. You have work, you have DIY projects, maybe you popped out a baby or two. Between the anniversaries & the birthdays to remember, you may hardly have time for friends, let alone yourself. This is both a sad and true event that takes place in everyone's lives. We make friends, work not that hard to keep them, have good times, find jobs, work a little bit harder to keep up the friendship, lose touch, find new friends who sometimes aren't as cool as the old ones~or sometimes way cooler, have a reunion w/ the old buds, promise not to lose touch, and then--you guessed it--lose touch. But this is where this post comes in; As a reminder not to let yourself forget who helped make your memories memorable. Friends. They're a fuckery-ass* bunch, but we'd die without 'em.


A friendship can weather most things and
thrive in thin soil; but it needs a little mulch of letters and phone calls and small, silly presents every so often - just to save it from drying out completely. ~ pam brown

Unfortunately, it isn't until you lose a friend or someone extremely close to you, when you realize relationships in general are something to be cherished. The laughter, oh my god the laughter.. ..the belly-busting, I'm about to pee my fucking pants laughter. If you took that very moment and put it on a split screen of an angry moment towards a friend, I'm pretty certain (at least for me), that the laughter will override any anger you had.
We have to actually work at keeping our friendships going. Plan a single day a week, a weekend a month, anything whatsoever, to reserve that attachment. Otherwise, all you'll be left with are blurry memories of 'What was..' Ya know the good ole "glory daze". Sure, a lot of us walk away with much more, I don't wanna seem like unless you keep up with friends it was all for nothing. But you never know how much you can brighten someones day by just giving a shit.
It doesn't take much to pick up the phone & give your 'once upon a time' pal a good conversation. Maybe a random meet-up at a bar, it doesn't even have to be one you're familiar with. Investing time in someone works both ways. Maybe you're the one that gave up, maybe someone else gave up on you--it doesn't fucking matter. Be active about it before they're gone, or before they move away to Hawaii, or before they tie the knot with some insecure chickadee that isn't comfortable with your relationship because you didn't invest enough time to get to know the her before she married/marries your best friend. There's no timeline on rekindling something that used to be. You just gotta make the attempt.
The surprising thing about that, is once you do make a little effort in reaching out to your old support
system and you get pass the potential awkwardness, it's usually business as normal. Almost as if you've never missed a day. With the true friends, that's how it is at least. And sure, they say people change every seven or so years, but it doesn't really change the real person you are within. Those inside jokes will still be funny and those crazy random stories will still make you feel youthful. It's that sense of nostalgia that gets you every time. The thought that when you were younger, you lived, you danced, you sang at the top of your lungs at 3 in the morning, and though you have some regrets--you still wouldn't have changed much.

The only way to have a friend, is to be one. ~ ralph waldon emerson


I propose a friendship revival. Too often I'll hear stories about a group of 'weekend warriors' that let their party style go stale. I understand, life happens, you can't always get lit and drink from Friday night until early Sunday morning every weekend. But maybe this weekend you can. Maybe just start out with a casual Friday night Happy Hour. See where it takes you. Schedule a cab, round up your guys & dolls and just have at it. Feature your favorite tunes, become the jukebox hero & hell--lose your pants even.

No one should ever let their fun & happiness take a back seat to anything, for any reason**. Sure, maybe you're a parent or a spouse and you need to assume responsibility over things. Do it, but don't let that become all you are. Take back what's yours! Scrap the stupid diet, drink at 11 a.m., call up (NOT TEXT) one of your favorite people you haven't seen in a while and declare a hang sesh. Just do what used to make you laugh and do it with the people that helped shape your memories and your youth. We're all on the wrong side of 25 and before we know it, we'll be 30, then 40, then... ...well anything after that doesn't need to be counted. We'll just be old then. No sense in acting 40 now. Just remember to keep in touch with people. Remember the fun times and try to reproduce them again. But whatever you do, remember...


Y O U T H








Don't be dismayed at good-byes. A farewell is necessary before you can meet again. And meeting again, after moments or lifetimes, is certain for those who are friends. ~ Richard Bach


Never shall I forget the days I spent with you. Continue to be my friend, as you will always find me yours. ~ Ludwig van Beethoven



*fuckery-ass: in both good & bad ways of being an amazing fuck. {not sexually-although it isn't limited to just being platonic.}
**unless it harms someone else, you sick fuck.

3 comments:

Jess said...

HAHAHHAHHA My pee is eating your peeeeeeeeee!!
I really do miss you face <3

Jenny Jupiter said...

Faceness!! I miss you too. So much. Nostalgia has always been a close friend of mine, but it's recently been hitting me hard. Brand New's- "Soco Amaretto Lime" kicked it off. Give it another listen. :) I think I WAS 18 when I first heard it. "18 forever, so we can stay like this foreverrr.. and we'll never miss a party cause we keep them going constantly..." ::sigh:: <3 <3 love you jess.

kid peligroso! said...

" I... Am a tool"